I think I would make an awesome spokes person

I have a few self esteem problems, but there is one thing that makes me feel pretty: mascara. You can't go wrong with long, full lashes.

I've been on a search for the best mascara. I think I've found the best one yet. The Falsies mascara from Maybelline. I almost feel like my eyes are caged in...but in a good way. I was skeptical about how well it would work, because makeup promises usually aren't fulfilled, but it does look like I have on false lashes. I think I've found my mascara. I am a little giddy.

Here's a before!  

and this is the after (after a long day of wear too). 

Schockingly

I used to love this picture and would use it all the time. Oddly enough, I still like it. I look very shocked.

My ink and me

When you put something on your body forever, a lot of thought and commitment come into play. I have two tattoos that represent me almost completely. I have an ivy peace sign on my ankle that reminds me that I'm a natural hippie at heart and nothing will ever really change that. I also have a shooting star on my back  because as corny as it may sound the sky is the limit. Now it is time for my friends and family. I'm going to have a lot of ink, but hey I want to be able to carry around a piece of them no matter where I go.

I'm still as insecure as the teenager I was.

We talked about self-esteem today in my Social Psychology class. we took an inventory of whether or not we had high/low self-esteem. Now, I know I have low self-esteem, but it's kind of weird when you know you have low self-esteem. It's not even on the moderate line or close, which I thought it would be at least close.

Of course high and low self-esteem both have their ups and downs. For instance, people with lower self-esteem have more accurate self appraisal, and are less likely than those with higher self-esteem to overestimate their abilities. So, I guess I'm less likely to make a jackass out of myself, which can be put in the win column.

Apparently, I'm also less likely to let things go. And I don't let things go. Bad things stick with me a whole lot more than the good, but I think of it as being prepared for all scenarios.

At least I'm ready for my life to fall to shambles.

I'm a psychology minor, and I took most of my classes for said minor a couple years ago. Now, that I have a psychology class again that is not about teaching children, I'm starting to self-diagnose again. I'm almost positive that both my mother and I are bi-polar.

I have to learn Greek now?

My life goals have altered several times over the course of life as it does for most people. Currently, I am on a fifteen year-ish plan when it comes to my future career. Odds are I'll give up the dream eventually, because lets be honest, I'm not the most driven person. Let me give you my plan:

1. Finish my undergrad degree. I have a year, a couple summer sessions, and my semester of student teaching. This is the most attainable of my goals. The one I am most focused on accomplishing.
2. Next I will teach for about five years, so I may pay down some of my school debt.
3. I will then go to get my masters in history education. I will probably achieve this at my current school, because I know it so well (we stick with what we know).  This should take me about two years, if I'm not incapable. I would love to get this done if not for an elevated pay. 
4. Teach a couple more years to pay down those debts.
5. Finally, get my Ph.D from either Greensboro or Florida. Depending on which college I choose and the degree I want to go for will dictate whether I must learn Greek or not. I'm not good with languages, so I should probably make up my mind and get to studying.
6. Then I will teach the unsuspecting college students of the world. Either about ancient Greece or Colonial Pirates (those are the two I'm considering)

These are just my professional goals. I also want to get married and have babies. Just thought you guys should know about what is pressing on my mind recently.

It's xmas time in the city, so I'm going to talk about my dog.

My face itches. There is a point to that statement. I need some better face moisturizers, because the one I have doesn't do a sufficient enough job, yet it makes me break out. It is the best of no worlds on my face right now, and it doesn't make me happy.

While I'm home for the Christmas break (probably the first time I spelled that out in years), I let my dog sleep in my bed. I love the dog. I do. He just has a tendency to wake me up at a decent hour and the college kid in me does not like that at all. It is really difficult to sleep when a ten pound dog starts walking around your head and sticking his nose in your face. I've been trying to teach him the concept of personal space, but alas he is a dog. Someone might want to tell my mom that, because she treats the dog like her third (favorite) child. You don't heat up dog food or hand feed the dog, especially if after spending four years with you he will be coming to my house. He will be considered lucky if he gets wet dog food at my house.

I tend to like to talk about my dog. I apologize. It sort of happens that way. I know animals aren't humans. They cannot compare to children, but he is the closest thing I have to a child, so sometimes I think of him along the same lines.  

I love xmas by the way. I love it more than most people. In fact, xmas would need a restraining order against me if it were a person, but  I like my dog more.

I'm self obsessed. I know it. I admit it. I wish I could fix it. I look at the ends of my hair all the time, because I have when my hair gets all ratty at the ends. This action gives me a headache and doesn't help my hair situation, but I do it about three hundred times a day. I look in the mirror a lot too.

I'm not really pretty. I know that, but I can't help thinking about my appearance all the time. I don't even have a problem with looking the way I do. I don't think it's really about appearance. It's more about the way it feels like greasy skin and fried hair.

I just thought you should all know I only think about myself.

I can be a real bitch.

There are very few things I do well. I'm ok with that. It's no big deal.

I'm no good with a paint brush, and sonnets come out of my mouth mangled. I can cook well enough to survive. I don't have the drive to be the best in school. I'm lazy and apathetic when it comes to most things, but please for your own sake, do not engage me in an argument.

I will not be your friend for the duration of our conversation if either of us get passionate. I don't hold punches (I will stay on topic though). I won't shut up until you submit or cry. I'm just not a fun person to riff with.

Luckily for you (and everyone that knows me), I do not consider much an actual argument. You really have to piss me off. Other times, it is just a discussion, nothing more.

I am a great arguer, and I love to do it too. I rarely get to, but exchanging venomous words exhilarates me. I know it is wrong on many counts. I'm pretty sure I only like it, because I am good at it. Can you really blame me for that?

My favorite thing I've ever said to someone while arguing: "I have a mouth full of words that have nothing to do with her."