Dear Jazz,

Thank you. You were my best friend when I didn't know how to talk to humans. You gave me something to love that wouldn't dare break my heart, until now. You stayed at home with me on Saturday nights when I had no where else to go. You loved me even when I was a child that was just a little too cruel.

It hardly seems fair that you are a memory before your death. Knowing that that event is coming soon is making me nostalgic. I love you, you know? I always have and always will even if it doesn't seem like it right now.

That's my fault. I can't help it. Looking into your eyes breaks my heart. Watching you struggle to do everything breaks my heart. Shatters the blood pumping organ.

You used to be able to climb fences. Do you remember that? Or when you would jump over them entirely? You were a hand full. I think you were too smart. You had to be smarter than some people.

I've called you an evil genius on multiple occasions. You always got to do just about everything you wanted with little to no regard of what we said.

I remember the snow. You were the funniest thing to watch on snowy days. We would go sledding (which you deemed too dangerous). You would grab us by the gloves and put a stop to that nonsense. Sometimes you would get skin. I bled once, but it was still more fun than painful.

You are a bit of a racist. Sexist too. I don't know how you kept that up with your failing vision or how you got the notion in the first place. To be fair you never liked anyone without our last name.

I'm sorry about my childish cruelty. I was young and didn't know how to be a good pet owner.

I remember when Dad could hold you in one hand yet you would monopolize both my arms. I remember calling you the world's biggest lap dog. Or how you would lick me right in the face despite my protests.

I hope I don't remember Friday for what it will mean to you. It is KT's birthday, and you like KT. I don't think you'd want me to remember it for that as well.

I'm going to miss you baby-dog, because you meant the world to me. <3